1 00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:10,719 [Nancy] Wow. 2 00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:14,473 I can't believe you sleep in a bed every night. 3 00:00:14,556 --> 00:00:19,686 Ooh, a girl could really get used to this pillow business. 4 00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,605 Yep, I could've used one. 5 00:00:21,688 --> 00:00:25,943 [Groans] God. Hey, would you mind rubbing this knot in my shoulder, Nancy? 6 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,819 Hey, hey, hey. 7 00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:29,238 You know the rules. 8 00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:34,785 This is a fake relationship, so I am not rubbing any of your man parts. 9 00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:37,079 I mean, technically, everyone has shoulders. 10 00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:39,248 Ooh, now how about we head downstairs 11 00:00:39,331 --> 00:00:43,418 and get that living Butler to make us something to smell for breakfast? 12 00:00:43,502 --> 00:00:44,503 You mean Sam? 13 00:00:44,586 --> 00:00:45,879 She's actually a writer 14 00:00:45,963 --> 00:00:47,883 and a small business owner, she's not our Butler. 15 00:00:47,923 --> 00:00:50,384 Oh, okay, okay. 16 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:52,135 Too good to be a Butler. 17 00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:54,930 You know, when I was alive, women couldn't even be a Butler. 18 00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:57,307 You could be a wench, a midwife or a whore. 19 00:00:57,391 --> 00:01:00,310 Oh. Well, that's not something 20 00:01:00,394 --> 00:01:02,479 I feel particularly compelled to follow up on. 21 00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,314 [Theme tune playing] 22 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,070 [Phone chimes, buzzes] 23 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,701 Oh, that's bela. She'll be here in an hour. 24 00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:20,247 And now you'll probably explain to a room full of ghosts who bela is. 25 00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:22,666 I mean, was curious, yes. 26 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:23,917 Bela's Jay's sister. 27 00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:25,436 She lives in Boston, she's coming to visit. 28 00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:27,254 - Oh. - Oh, must be nice. 29 00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:29,673 All my sisters died before the age of two. 30 00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:32,426 Damn, Isaac, we ain't even smelled our morning coffee yet. 31 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,320 [Samantha] Bela's boyfriend broke up with her last week, 32 00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:36,024 so she's coming to stay to clear her head. 33 00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,723 How is she doing now, Jay? 34 00:01:37,806 --> 00:01:40,642 I talked to her a few days ago, and she's still really down. 35 00:01:40,726 --> 00:01:42,603 - Oh, that's great. - Excuse me? 36 00:01:42,686 --> 00:01:44,187 No, I mean, it's awful. 37 00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:45,522 It's just, you know, 38 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,899 I excel in helping girlfriends get over breakups. 39 00:01:47,983 --> 00:01:50,360 I hope she really likes the legally blonde franchise, 40 00:01:50,444 --> 00:01:52,696 'cause that is gonna be a big part of her next 48 hours. 41 00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:55,741 Okay, let's just try not to act too excited. 42 00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:56,992 Sorry, sorry. 43 00:01:57,075 --> 00:01:59,995 It's just, I thought this could be a chance for she and I to finally bond. 44 00:02:00,037 --> 00:02:01,872 Look, I don't have siblings, 45 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:04,458 so when you and I got married, I thought bela and I 46 00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,501 could become sisters, but that hasn't happened. 47 00:02:06,585 --> 00:02:08,003 [Isaac] Excuse me, 48 00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:10,589 but in what room will this bela be sleeping? 49 00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:12,549 Oh, right. Well, I guess one of you guys 50 00:02:12,633 --> 00:02:14,473 will have to give up your room for the weekend. 51 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:16,386 [Ghosts dissenting] 52 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:17,679 - Sorry. - [Thorfinn] Okay. 53 00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:19,848 I have plan. 54 00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,558 Thor, we can't kill bela. 55 00:02:21,642 --> 00:02:25,687 [Laughs] It's not what I was going to say, but, uh, 56 00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:28,940 give Thor a moment to think of what I was going to say. 57 00:02:29,024 --> 00:02:31,401 [Sighs] Not kill. 58 00:02:32,152 --> 00:02:33,153 [Isaac] Troops, 59 00:02:33,236 --> 00:02:35,423 Samantha has informed us that one of us will be required 60 00:02:35,447 --> 00:02:37,366 to forfeit our rooms. 61 00:02:37,449 --> 00:02:39,135 Can't the sister just take the empty bedroom? 62 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,285 [Hetty] We offered that, 63 00:02:40,369 --> 00:02:43,121 but Samantha is aware of the mold and the draft. 64 00:02:43,205 --> 00:02:45,308 You got to sell the view. When I was pushing penny stocks, 65 00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:46,708 you think I emphasized the risk? 66 00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,502 No, you shine that turd. 67 00:02:48,585 --> 00:02:49,836 I call not it. 68 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:51,171 Is unbreakable oath. 69 00:02:51,254 --> 00:02:53,256 Oh, please, that is how children make decisions. 70 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:54,925 But also, not it. 71 00:02:55,008 --> 00:02:56,968 Trevor is the most recently dead, let him take it. 72 00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:59,513 Ooh, that's how we divvied things up in the first place. 73 00:02:59,596 --> 00:03:02,849 This time we do it in reserve order of seniority. 74 00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:05,644 Thor not like this. This is bad outcome for Thor. 75 00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:08,563 [Overlapping chatter] 76 00:03:09,940 --> 00:03:12,818 -The sanctity of my room will not be—- -hey! Hey! Guys! 77 00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:14,820 I can't stand to watch you fight. 78 00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:16,321 - I will take the room. - Oh. 79 00:03:16,405 --> 00:03:17,614 - You sure, Pete? - Yeah. 80 00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,175 You know, a little mold never hurt anybody. 81 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:20,385 [Laughs] It'll be like camping. 82 00:03:20,409 --> 00:03:23,537 Then it's settled. Thank you, Pete, for your sacrifice, and for your sake, 83 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:24,722 I hope that the rain holds out 84 00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:26,307 so you don't have to deal with that pesky leak. 85 00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:29,960 Uh? Oh, sorry... The-the... there's a leak in there now? 86 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,503 Be even more like camping. 87 00:03:31,586 --> 00:03:32,879 - —[Laughs] True. - Nature. 88 00:03:32,963 --> 00:03:36,007 Nature. Yay! 89 00:03:38,969 --> 00:03:39,970 [Knock on door] 90 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,596 Okay, that must be her. 91 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:44,141 Let the girl bonding begin. 92 00:03:46,309 --> 00:03:48,520 Ll uncool Jay. 93 00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,273 - 'Cause that never gets old. - —[Laughs] Hey. 94 00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,859 - [Samantha] Hey. - Hey, Sam. 95 00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:56,027 Hi. Oh, I don't need a nickname, 96 00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:58,280 but Manhattan Sam chowder could be something 97 00:03:58,363 --> 00:03:59,573 if you're looking for one. 98 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,616 What? You mean new england? 99 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:02,868 Manhattan is a soup, as well. 100 00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:06,705 It's also where I lived, so... It's tomato-based. 101 00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:08,790 - [Thorfinn chuckles] - This is painful. 102 00:04:08,874 --> 00:04:11,042 Yeah, I can't watch this. 103 00:04:11,126 --> 00:04:15,589 Oh, this place is epic. Okay. [Laughs] 104 00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:19,176 - It is so good to see you guys. - [Jay] It's good to see you, too. 105 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,344 I wish it could have been under better circumstances. 106 00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,722 Oh, but don't worry. I have the perfect night planned 107 00:04:23,805 --> 00:04:25,474 to help you get over that jerk. 108 00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:29,352 - Oh, guys, it's cool. I'm so over him. - What's that? 109 00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:31,271 - I met someone new. - [Jay] Already? 110 00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,481 Wow. 111 00:04:32,564 --> 00:04:35,025 So you don't need, like, any cheering up at all, huh? 112 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:38,069 - —[Laughs] That's great. - There goes that plan. 113 00:04:38,153 --> 00:04:41,448 [Bela] Yeah, I set my dating profile to the Hudson valley a couple days ago, 114 00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:43,909 'cause I knew I was gonna be up here, and then boom, 115 00:04:43,992 --> 00:04:45,911 I matched with this insanely hot guy. 116 00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:47,704 We've been messaging, 117 00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:49,080 and we're really vibing. 118 00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:50,349 [Gasps] Do you want to see him? 119 00:04:50,373 --> 00:04:51,708 Yeah, sure. 120 00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,544 Oh, dang. I got to stop leaving my house on 17%. 121 00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:56,922 Well, I'm gonna drop my bags and grab a charge. 122 00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,006 I'll show you the way. 123 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:02,844 Sorry Jay's sister's not devastated, Sam. 124 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,847 Yes, we are here for you. 125 00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:07,474 Thanks, guys. 126 00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:13,230 So, you just gave away our pillow palace to some rando's sister? 127 00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:15,065 It's not some rando. It's Jay. 128 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:17,150 Who the hell's Jay? 129 00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:19,027 - Sam's husband? - Huh? 130 00:05:19,110 --> 00:05:21,196 The living Butler's husband? 131 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:24,616 Oh, face it, Pete. You're a pushover. 132 00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:28,161 Because I gave in on one little thing in the interest of house Harmony? 133 00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:31,164 You didn't give in on one thing. You give in on everything. 134 00:05:31,248 --> 00:05:32,541 You told me yourself 135 00:05:32,624 --> 00:05:34,543 you never get to pick the movie on movie night. 136 00:05:34,626 --> 00:05:35,710 Well, that's true. 137 00:05:35,794 --> 00:05:38,839 And you're always the caboose in the massage train. 138 00:05:38,922 --> 00:05:41,883 - I mean, someone's got to be. - Why can't it be a circle, huh? 139 00:05:41,967 --> 00:05:45,178 That way, everyone gets their man parts rubbed. 140 00:05:45,262 --> 00:05:47,806 Again, shoulders are not specific to men. 141 00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:51,518 You start standing up for yourself and get our room back, 142 00:05:51,601 --> 00:05:55,146 or I will tell everyone our relationship is fake 143 00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:58,233 and that you have a huge crush on alberta. 144 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,294 You know, there's a certain irony 145 00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:02,779 to you strong-arming me into being less of a pushover. 146 00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:05,282 That did not escape me, Pete. [Chuckles] 147 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,200 [Coughs] 148 00:06:08,159 --> 00:06:10,871 Housekeeping. [Samantha chuckles] 149 00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:12,414 And we are charged. 150 00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:14,392 - Do you want to see the guy? - [Samantha] Oh. Yes, please. 151 00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:16,251 Okay, now, he's not my normal type. 152 00:06:16,334 --> 00:06:18,670 He comes off as this, like, douchey finance bro. 153 00:06:18,753 --> 00:06:20,297 And he is a little, 154 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,090 but he's also, like, really sensitive. 155 00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:25,886 Damn, bela! 156 00:06:25,969 --> 00:06:28,555 - —Get it, girl. This dude is hot. - Right? 157 00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:31,224 Oh, my god. 158 00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,270 He's really something. 159 00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:36,730 I can explain. 160 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:44,279 Look, I don't see what's wrong. I mean, that guy seems great. 161 00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:47,115 Not to mention, so dreamy. 162 00:06:47,198 --> 00:06:48,700 - Wow. That's so kind. - No. 163 00:06:48,783 --> 00:06:51,178 I don't want another word out of you unless it's explaining why 164 00:06:51,202 --> 00:06:53,762 my sister-in-law was chatting to a guy with your profile picture. 165 00:06:53,788 --> 00:06:56,499 - Whose picture? - The guy in the photo, it was Trevor. 166 00:06:56,583 --> 00:07:00,211 Trevor? No pants? The one who keeps hitting on you? 167 00:07:00,295 --> 00:07:03,089 How come you never told me about those cheekbones? 168 00:07:03,173 --> 00:07:05,300 - Okay, starting to warm up to this guy. - You. 169 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:07,677 Just out with it. What the hell is going on? 170 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:10,513 - I may have made myself a dating profile. - What? 171 00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:13,725 - How? - Well, it all started a few months back. 172 00:07:13,808 --> 00:07:16,478 I was minding my own business, hoping I might get lucky 173 00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:20,065 and see a painter fall off his ladder. When you've been dead 20 years, 174 00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:21,834 it's the little things that really keep you going. 175 00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:23,610 - Please get to the point. - Right. 176 00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:25,320 Anyway, he took a break, 177 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:27,989 and nothing prepared me for what I saw next. 178 00:07:30,158 --> 00:07:31,284 So many women. 179 00:07:31,368 --> 00:07:32,786 [Chuckles] So many varieties. 180 00:07:32,869 --> 00:07:35,246 Short women. Tall women. Platinum blondes. 181 00:07:35,330 --> 00:07:37,930 - Dirty blondes. Strawberry blondes. - [Samantha] This is painful. 182 00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:41,628 [Trevor] The humble craftsman had shown me a brave new world, 183 00:07:41,711 --> 00:07:44,506 and I knew right away that I wanted in. 184 00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,174 So, for the next month, istudied. 185 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:50,178 I learned how to download apps. I asked all the right questions. 186 00:07:50,261 --> 00:07:54,182 Oh, what a cute little stinker. How exactly did you save that? 187 00:07:54,265 --> 00:07:56,893 - In detail. - Oh, it's easy. 188 00:07:56,977 --> 00:08:00,063 You just press down, and the menu pops up, and... 189 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:01,564 Interesting. 190 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:05,735 And eventually I was ready to put my plan into action. 191 00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:09,155 [Chuckles] 192 00:08:09,239 --> 00:08:10,591 [Samantha] He used the kitchen iPad. 193 00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:13,535 I knew we needed a better password than 1234. 194 00:08:13,618 --> 00:08:17,247 You're right. I should have anticipated a ghost catfishing my sister. 195 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,016 Wait, how did you get a picture of yourself? 196 00:08:19,040 --> 00:08:21,418 [Trevor] It took weeks of sneaking down 197 00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,545 night after night, working letter by letter. 198 00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:26,089 Sam, I was like Andy Dufresne chiseling 199 00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:27,817 through to a new life with a little rock hammer. 200 00:08:27,841 --> 00:08:29,134 Andy Dufresne? Who's that? 201 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:30,802 - Seriously? Shawshank. - Shawshank. 202 00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:32,387 Come on, babe. 203 00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:34,848 [Trevor] Finally, after all that toiling... 204 00:08:34,931 --> 00:08:36,391 [Panting] 205 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:38,685 It was done. 206 00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,895 The perfect profile. 207 00:08:46,192 --> 00:08:47,193 [Grunts] 208 00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:50,238 And then, one fateful night, I started getting matches. 209 00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:52,449 [Grunts] 210 00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,385 And then two days ago, I matched with Jay's sister. 211 00:08:54,409 --> 00:08:56,262 And then a couple days ago, he matched with bela. 212 00:08:56,286 --> 00:08:58,663 They feel pain when we pass through them, right? 213 00:08:58,747 --> 00:08:59,890 - Jay. - Is he seri... [grunts] 214 00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:02,167 Come here! Oh! [Grunts] 215 00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:06,629 Where are you? Ooh. [Screams] 216 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,423 Oh! Did I get him? 217 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:10,008 Yeah, really good. 218 00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:11,651 - —[Clears throat] - [Trevor] I'm sorry. 219 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:13,678 The only thing that hurts more 220 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:15,930 than knowing that I died before finding true love 221 00:09:16,014 --> 00:09:18,159 is knowing that I died before I could crush it on these apps. 222 00:09:18,183 --> 00:09:20,101 What was your endgame, Trevor? 223 00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:22,187 I just wanted the validation, I guess. 224 00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,397 But then bela showed up at the house, and I realized 225 00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,816 those are real people on those apps. 226 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,003 Or maybe they're other super motivated ghosts like me, 227 00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:30,111 but that seems less likely. 228 00:09:30,195 --> 00:09:34,032 - Do you have any idea what you've done? - I'm sorry. 229 00:09:34,115 --> 00:09:35,825 It's really lonely being a ghost. 230 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,749 I miss having that connection with someone new, 231 00:09:37,786 --> 00:09:40,789 that hope that she might be the one. 232 00:09:40,872 --> 00:09:42,415 I'm never gonna get that again. 233 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,376 No! I'm still mad. 234 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:48,963 Ooh, Sam, this is really, really bad. 235 00:09:49,047 --> 00:09:51,132 Bela was so upset when Gabe broke up with her. 236 00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:54,219 Her emoji use was unhinged. 237 00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:56,805 If she finds out she was catfished now... 238 00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:58,681 Well, you wanted a reason to cheer her up. 239 00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:03,186 No. I actually wanted to help her through a normal but difficult situation. 240 00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,688 I didn't want her destroyed by some dead frat bro. 241 00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:07,774 [Jay] Oh, we are going to have to play this 242 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,275 very delicately. 243 00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,027 I got it. 244 00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,487 Trevor has to "move." 245 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:13,988 Yes. 246 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:16,991 To somewhere far away and unappealing. 247 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:19,435 Because she's my sister, I love her, but she's very thirsty, 248 00:10:19,494 --> 00:10:22,205 and she could follow him. I mean, I saw thatjawline. 249 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:23,289 It's like granite. 250 00:10:23,373 --> 00:10:24,874 Love this guy. 251 00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:26,543 [Pete] Howdy, folks. 252 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,646 - This will just take a minute. - [Hetty] What is this? 253 00:10:28,670 --> 00:10:31,148 Isaac and I were in the middle of a riveting debate on scarves. 254 00:10:31,172 --> 00:10:34,217 You got this, Pete. Just like we practiced. 255 00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:36,553 [Exhales] Listen up, ghosts. 256 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,055 I have spent the last 40 years 257 00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:42,684 bending over backwards to compromise for the sake of house Harmony, 258 00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,311 but I'm here to tell you I'm done. 259 00:10:45,395 --> 00:10:47,939 I've had it up to my arrow with all of your applesauce. 260 00:10:48,523 --> 00:10:50,608 It's time for Pete to finally get what he wants. 261 00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:53,153 And he wants a mold-free room, 262 00:10:53,236 --> 00:10:57,365 so one of you is making way for Pete and his girl. 263 00:10:57,448 --> 00:11:00,285 If that's amenable to everyone. 264 00:11:00,368 --> 00:11:02,036 Or even if it's not. 265 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:03,371 - [Nancy] Yeah. - [Pete] Also, 266 00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:05,707 I will no longer be the caboose on the massage train. 267 00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:08,418 I lead it now. I'm the engine. 268 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:10,545 [Laughs] You hear that? 269 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:12,255 - Let's go. - All right. 270 00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:17,760 Well, the moment we all feared has arrived. 271 00:11:18,386 --> 00:11:19,846 Pete's developed a spine. 272 00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,557 This is an unfortunate turn of events. 273 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,800 What are y'all talking about? 274 00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,328 Pete's finally sticking up for himself, and you think that's a bad thing? 275 00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:29,480 Need I remind you what it was like before that Saint of a man 276 00:11:29,564 --> 00:11:31,357 was felled by a little girl's arrow? 277 00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,359 No one compromised on anything around here. 278 00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:34,527 Isaac is right. 279 00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:36,196 Pete's spinelessness is 280 00:11:36,279 --> 00:11:39,324 the grease that keeps the wheels of our little world turning. 281 00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:41,534 We had people like Pete in viking society. 282 00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:43,328 We sacrificed them, 283 00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:46,789 then gave their blood to please our gods and prevent famine. 284 00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:50,752 They were respected. Dead but respected. 285 00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:53,630 Well, I like this new Pete. 286 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:54,923 He's got gumption. 287 00:11:55,006 --> 00:11:57,800 And maybe the answer isn't him going back to the way he was. 288 00:11:57,884 --> 00:12:02,931 Maybe the answer is all of us actually learning to compromise for once. 289 00:12:04,265 --> 00:12:06,577 - There's got to be a better way. - —[Laughs] That's not happening. 290 00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:07,977 [Footsteps approaching] 291 00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:10,980 Hey, bela. What's wrong? 292 00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:14,609 Turns out Trevor's a lying piece of trash. 293 00:12:14,692 --> 00:12:16,653 He told me he's moving to newfoundland, 294 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:17,737 which sounds made-up. 295 00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:19,781 I told you, we should have gone with mykonos. 296 00:12:19,864 --> 00:12:22,784 - It could be real. - Mm, yeah. He could've moved there. 297 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,244 Although, obviously, 298 00:12:24,327 --> 00:12:28,164 it's too far and cold to visit or follow someone to. 299 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,250 Mm, something's off. 300 00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:33,336 I'm looking this asshat up. See if he's even who he says he is. 301 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:36,130 You don't know his last name. How could you even do that? 302 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:38,633 Oh, I just do a reverse image search with his profile photo. 303 00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:42,011 Oh. That's so cool that you can do that. 304 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:45,473 [Bela] This picture's from an obituary, 305 00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:47,934 and the guy died 20 years ago. 306 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:49,411 It's the only picture of me on the Internet. 307 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,562 Oh, my god. Do you know what this means? 308 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:53,690 I got catfished. 309 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:54,774 - No. - What? 310 00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:57,318 This is messed-up. He is not getting away with this. 311 00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,570 "Hey, doucher, I know you're not real. 312 00:12:59,654 --> 00:13:03,241 And bt dubs, catfishing is so ten years ago." 313 00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:04,701 - [Message sends] - [iPad chimes] 314 00:13:04,784 --> 00:13:06,703 "Who are you? Some thousand-year-old virgin?" 315 00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:08,329 - [Message sends] - [iPad chimes] 316 00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,835 Bela, wait. 317 00:13:14,585 --> 00:13:16,004 - [Message sends] - [iPad chimes] 318 00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:20,550 Why does that sound keep coming from your iPad? 319 00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:22,194 Great question. Why don't you hand it over, 320 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:23,720 and I'll take it to the genius bar. 321 00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:27,098 - —Unlock the iPad, Jay. - I would, but I-I forgot the passcode. 322 00:13:27,181 --> 00:13:30,351 Well, luckily, it's been the same since junior high. 1-2-3-4. 323 00:13:31,853 --> 00:13:33,688 [Sighs] 324 00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:37,108 You're Trevor? 325 00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,991 Okay, I am freaking out right now. 326 00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:46,427 Bela, it's not what it looks like. 327 00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:49,871 We just invited you up to the house because we wanted to cheer you up. 328 00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,623 You thought creating Trevor would cheer me up? 329 00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:54,208 - Ew. No. - Oh, no. 330 00:13:54,292 --> 00:13:56,294 You didn't think I could find a real man again, 331 00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:59,839 so you created a fake one to flirt with me and compliment my smile. 332 00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:02,175 - I really meant that. - [Bela] And you made up a guy 333 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:05,053 that is exactly everything I'm looking for. 334 00:14:05,136 --> 00:14:07,722 Someone who loves clubbing and the Hamptons 335 00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:09,682 and jam bands from the late '90s. 336 00:14:09,766 --> 00:14:11,434 We're freaking meant for each other. 337 00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:12,602 That's not what happened. 338 00:14:12,685 --> 00:14:14,687 - Then what did happen? - I... 339 00:14:15,772 --> 00:14:17,523 Don't have a good explanation. 340 00:14:17,607 --> 00:14:19,108 You guys are sick. 341 00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:20,651 I'm packing my bags and leaving. 342 00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,572 I mean, we sexted. 343 00:14:24,655 --> 00:14:26,115 Ugh! 344 00:14:27,033 --> 00:14:28,910 I didn't know it had a name. 345 00:14:28,993 --> 00:14:30,411 [Jay shudders] 346 00:14:30,495 --> 00:14:34,082 That's Hetty, alberta, oh, and me. Three against one. 347 00:14:34,165 --> 00:14:37,085 Thor, you must give up your room to Pete and the filthy one. 348 00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:39,545 Mm-mm. Thor not moving. 349 00:14:39,629 --> 00:14:40,963 But we voted. 350 00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:44,550 Thor not believe in democracy. [Isaac] Oh, how convenient. 351 00:14:44,634 --> 00:14:46,511 Fine. I change my vote to Isaac. 352 00:14:46,594 --> 00:14:48,471 - Me, too. - Weasels! 353 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:49,555 All of you. 354 00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:51,950 They're hurting each other's feelings. I have to put a stop to this. 355 00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:54,018 - [Overlapping arguing] - Oh, here we go. 356 00:14:54,102 --> 00:14:57,897 Spineless Pete worming his way back to the surface. 357 00:14:57,980 --> 00:15:00,066 Do you want to know why I compromise, Nancy? 358 00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:03,152 - Yeah. - I'm modeling for these people. 359 00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:05,796 Yes, it's been 40 years, and, yes, they're not exactly picking up 360 00:15:05,822 --> 00:15:08,324 what I'm laying down, but I believe in them. 361 00:15:08,408 --> 00:15:10,243 They have good in them. 362 00:15:10,326 --> 00:15:12,787 [Sighs] And, eventually, they're gonna get there. 363 00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:15,623 And until that time, I'm gonna keep setting an example. 364 00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:20,253 That's bs. You're just scared of someone not liking you. 365 00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:22,588 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah, you wimp. 366 00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:23,798 That is enough! 367 00:15:23,881 --> 00:15:25,049 Powder off your wig. 368 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:27,343 I cannot take one more minute of your bullying! 369 00:15:27,427 --> 00:15:30,012 You want me to stand up for myself and have a spine? 370 00:15:30,096 --> 00:15:32,682 Well, here we go! It is over between us. 371 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:35,226 I am done listening to you. 372 00:15:35,309 --> 00:15:36,995 So if you have something you want to say to everyone, 373 00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,855 - you just go ahead and say it. - Fine! 374 00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,898 [Sighs] 375 00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:46,988 I'm going back down to the basement 376 00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:51,033 'cause I just broke up with my very real boyfriend 377 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:53,244 and, also, 'cause you all suck, 378 00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:57,165 and I'd rather be with the cholera pit people. Huh. 379 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:00,281 [Whispers] Proud of you, petey. 380 00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:05,673 [Sighs, sniffs] Now, you listen up good. 381 00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:07,258 I'm taking the moldy room, 382 00:16:07,341 --> 00:16:09,181 and I don't want to hear another word about it. 383 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:13,973 Yeah. That's what I thought. 384 00:16:14,056 --> 00:16:16,100 Does that mean she's single now, or...? 385 00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:18,769 [Jay] Bela. 386 00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:20,354 I have nothing to say to you two. 387 00:16:20,438 --> 00:16:22,624 No, no, you have to trust that we weren't trying to hurt you. 388 00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:24,376 It doesn't matter what you were trying to do. 389 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,777 You thought I was so pathetic that the best way 390 00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:29,238 to help me was to concoct some giant lie. 391 00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:33,618 I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive you. 392 00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:37,663 - It was a ghost. - What? 393 00:16:37,747 --> 00:16:39,540 Babe, are you sure about this? 394 00:16:39,624 --> 00:16:41,584 Look, I know that this is gonna sound crazy, 395 00:16:41,667 --> 00:16:44,128 but if it has any chance of salvaging this relationship, 396 00:16:44,212 --> 00:16:45,421 I have to come clean. 397 00:16:46,589 --> 00:16:49,842 A few months ago, I fell down the stairs and I went into a coma. 398 00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:51,445 Thank you for the flowers, by the way. 399 00:16:51,469 --> 00:16:53,596 And when I woke up, I could see ghosts. 400 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:56,432 Trevor died in this house 20 years ago. 401 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,809 And he doesn't wear pants, which may not seem relevant, 402 00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:00,954 but it's something I have to know, and now you do too. 403 00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:02,480 [Samantha] Anyhow, somehow, 404 00:17:02,563 --> 00:17:04,273 he managed to create a dating profile, 405 00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:07,026 and the important part of the story is, I see ghosts. 406 00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:10,279 And besides Jay, you're the only person I've ever told. 407 00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:12,448 I know this must be 408 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,076 difficult to believe, but I sincerely hope you do. 409 00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:17,078 Honestly, Sam, 410 00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,162 get help. 411 00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:22,333 [Jay] Bela. 412 00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:24,669 Bela, hold up. 413 00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:28,005 Look, I'm not crazy, or at least I'm not lying. 414 00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:30,132 And I can prove it. Thor, lights. 415 00:17:30,216 --> 00:17:31,342 Sam, chair! 416 00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:33,094 No, get the lights. 417 00:17:33,177 --> 00:17:34,554 Oh, right, yes. 418 00:17:35,179 --> 00:17:36,180 [Grunts] 419 00:17:38,808 --> 00:17:39,809 What was that? 420 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,435 Alberta, hum us a tune. 421 00:17:41,519 --> 00:17:42,603 Oh, finally. 422 00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:45,106 [Humming melody] 423 00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:48,818 [Humming echoing] 424 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:52,280 Okay, that's a trick. Secret switches, speakers. 425 00:17:52,363 --> 00:17:54,574 - Dsaac? - Hmm? What? Oh, uh, you know what? 426 00:17:54,657 --> 00:17:57,243 - No, I'll pass. Thank you. - Isaac, please. 427 00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:58,619 Fine. 428 00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:01,789 [Isaac grunts] 429 00:18:01,872 --> 00:18:04,458 Oh! That is nasty. 430 00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:07,753 - Okay, it's no picnic for me either. - Okay, what is happening? 431 00:18:07,837 --> 00:18:09,213 You just met some of the ghosts. 432 00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:12,341 I can tell you what's in your bag. Pete. 433 00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:17,805 - [Pete] We got a pair of hiking boots... - A pair of hiking boots. 434 00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:18,889 A beanie. 435 00:18:18,973 --> 00:18:21,618 - [Pete] Three unread back issues of... - [Samantha] Three unread back issues 436 00:18:21,642 --> 00:18:23,769 of the new yorker. And... I'm just saying this 437 00:18:23,853 --> 00:18:25,855 to prove a point—- a personal massager. 438 00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:27,607 Oh, why you got to tell me that? 439 00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:30,443 How many fingers am I holding up? 440 00:18:31,861 --> 00:18:35,615 - Three. - Holy crap. 441 00:18:36,490 --> 00:18:38,034 You can see ghosts? 442 00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:40,411 What is personal massager? 443 00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:46,083 [Bela] So, ghosts don't eat, 444 00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:47,168 but they sleep? 445 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:48,437 And they don't go to the bathroom? 446 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:50,630 Then what about... you know? 447 00:18:50,713 --> 00:18:54,050 - Yeah, surprisingly, that one's a yes. - [Bela] Wow. 448 00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,260 And, like, could a ghost do it with a human? 449 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:57,988 [Gasps] No. You know what? I'm not there yet. 450 00:18:58,012 --> 00:19:00,306 Please don't tell anyone about this, bela. 451 00:19:00,389 --> 00:19:01,599 Your secret's safe with me. 452 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:05,728 Hey, am I really the only one you've told besides Jay? 453 00:19:05,811 --> 00:19:08,606 - Yeah. - Wow, I can't believe that. 454 00:19:08,689 --> 00:19:09,690 That really means a lot. 455 00:19:10,775 --> 00:19:12,794 Kind of makes me feel really close to you. [Chuckles softly] 456 00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:15,321 - Is that stupid? - No, I don't think that's stupid. 457 00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:17,156 You know, I always kind of wanted a sister. 458 00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:19,367 Instead, all I got was this dork. 459 00:19:19,450 --> 00:19:21,661 She made me wear a dress till I was five. 460 00:19:21,744 --> 00:19:22,870 Did you say "sister"? 461 00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:24,747 Yeah, don't be an idiot about it. 462 00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,708 - Don't you be an idiot about it. - [Laughs] 463 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:30,670 - —Jay, I'm doing sister banter. - [Chuckles] Nice work, babe. 464 00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:34,090 I'd like to say goodbye to bela if I could. 465 00:19:34,173 --> 00:19:36,300 I don't think anybody wants to hear from you. 466 00:19:36,384 --> 00:19:37,904 - What? - [Jay] Oh, it's a ghost thing. 467 00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:41,222 - You'll get used to it pretty fast. - Trevor's here. He wants a word. 468 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:43,516 It's okay. I'm willing to hear him out. 469 00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:44,767 [Samantha] Really? 470 00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:45,893 Fine. 471 00:19:45,976 --> 00:19:48,872 Okay, this is gonna be awkward for me, so I'm gonna leave the three of you to it. 472 00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:51,232 Or however many of you there are. 473 00:19:52,108 --> 00:19:54,235 Okay, Trevor, this better be good. 474 00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:56,153 Bela, I'm sorry I lied to you. 475 00:19:56,237 --> 00:19:58,406 "Bela, I'm sorry I lied to you." 476 00:19:58,489 --> 00:20:01,158 [Trevor] But the connection that we had, that wasn't a lie. 477 00:20:01,242 --> 00:20:03,577 I meant every word that I said. 478 00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:07,915 "I do love your eyes and your smile." 479 00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,208 And your boobs. 480 00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:13,546 - You forgot the boobs. - Nope. Just keep going. 481 00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:16,966 I talk a big game, 482 00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:18,426 but the truth is, 483 00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:20,970 I really did want to find someone to spend my life with, 484 00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,222 and I didn't. 485 00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:26,142 Life is way too short. 486 00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:27,685 I used to think that was 487 00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:30,271 a dumb thing that people said, but it's really true. 488 00:20:32,148 --> 00:20:34,650 Go find yourself someone who's as incredible as you. 489 00:20:36,527 --> 00:20:38,237 Because that's what you deserve. 490 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:40,072 "Because that's what you deserve." 491 00:20:41,031 --> 00:20:42,742 Thank you, Trevor. 492 00:20:42,825 --> 00:20:44,243 Also, please send nudes. 493 00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:45,411 And we're done.